“Why did those people just do that, Dad?” I hear this question regularly as my little blessings watch the world around them. They are these insatiable sponges of learning. I’m not sure they have ever run out of questions before I have run out of brain power to answer. “What is this, Dad?” The most basic question of learning. “Why?” This is the easiest follow-up question that can seemingly be repeated unendingly. In my experience thus far in the parenting journey, my children never cease to amaze me with some of the complex and thought-provoking questions they ask. From: “How does God make babies in Mama’s belly?” To, “Is that man (someone who recently passed away) going to heaven?” A beautiful, sanctifying frustration is found in a young one's ceaseless questioning with their parents.
Not only are they insatiable sponges of learning, but they are also professionals in the “do first and think later” philosophy. They run into poles, get stuck high on the monkey bars, put a rock up their nose, and tell the next-door neighbor they don’t look good in that outfit. As parents, there are times when we can see these things as comedic and chuckle. However, these are all tell-tale signs of a pressing reality of your child’s soul. Their most significant problem is their ratio of foolishness to wisdom, which is almost wholly foolish. God has graced children with parents for this specific purpose: to train them to understand and fulfill their purpose of glorifying God and enjoying Him forever. Okay, how do we do that?
We begin like any other project by setting a solid foundation. Your child needs a worldview. This is the lens through which they see all of life. What is fair, right, wrong, who they are, who God is, what truth is, etc. No child is without a worldview. The question is simply: who will teach them what it should be, and will there be competing proposals? There is no underestimating the vital importance of these early years in a child’s life. Much of the counseling I do with adults could have been nipped in the bud if they had been trained in God’s truth in their early years. We must teach our children and woo them to a biblical worldview. If they cannot begin by seeing reality as God has said, they will begin everything off on the wrong foot. This is like the man who begins to button up his shirt and misses a button at the bottom. Technically, 90% of the buttons are satisfied, but he has missed the point and looks foolish because his shirt is crooked now.
How do we build a biblical worldview for our children? Where is the manual for this thing?
“8 Hear, my son, your father’s instruction, and forsake not your mother’s teaching, 9 for they are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck.”
Proverbs 1:8-9
When was the last time we spoke like this to our children? I’ll throw myself in the doghouse first. It feels as though I rarely, if ever, talk to my child in this way. I act as though God has left me on my own as a parent to figure things out on the fly. Yet, God has given me a very easy-to-read, simple book of the Bible I can share with my children regularly. Smack-dab in the middle of your Bible is the book of Proverbs and the heart of parenting. We are older (hopefully more mature) sinners whom God has saved, leading younger sinners whom God has not saved yet (or perhaps has!) in the way of wisdom. That is our job in a nutshell. Listen to the words of Solomon pleading with his son:
“1 My son, do not forget my teaching but let your heart keep my commandments, 2 for length of days and years of life and peace they will add to you.”
Proverbs 3:1-2
“11 My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline or be weary of his reproof, 12 for the LORD reproves him whom he loves, as a father, the son in whom he delights.”
Proverbs 3:11-12
“21 My son, do not lose sight of these—keep sound wisdom and discretion, 22 and they will be life for your soul and adornment for your neck.”
Proverbs 3:21-22
“1 My son, keep my words and treasure up my commandments with you; 2 keep my commandments and live; keep my teaching as the apple of your eye; 3 bind them on your fingers; write them on the tablet of your heart.”
Proverbs 7:1-3
Many of us fall for the trap of complaining about how children need to be taught the same thing repeatedly. We become frustrated, say they have an attention disorder (I would argue some do, but not many), and send them to someone else to be trained. No matter who you send your child to, whether it is a grandparent, a public or private school, a Sunday school teacher, a pastor, or someone else, your job is to shepherd your child’s heart. All these resources are pouring into your child what they should believe and how they should perceive life, God, purpose, and identity. Repeat yourself often, patiently pursue your child’s heart, and plead with them to seek wisdom and to keep it amid a proudly foolish world.
My simple encouragement to you today is this. Take the responsibility of shepherding your children seriously. Do not treat them like they are an autonomous individual who can make all of their own decisions and can hold their own in the public square. They can’t. They are young fools in desperate need of someone to teach them wisdom. Make whatever sacrifices necessary to take your children to God’s word daily, to care for their little hearts, to mold their forming minds, and to help them become the men and women of God they are called to be. I’ll be right there along with you, stumbling forward in sanctification, depending on God’s grace to do anything right. Let’s stumble forward together and set the next generation up for success in an increasingly depraved world.
May God bless your week as you seek His kingdom first!
Grace and Peace,
Pastor Dan
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