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Pastor Dan

Church Conundrums: Discipline

I remember being an athlete in high school, and one of the things some younger players would say to older players was, “I wish I was as strong/fast/good as you. I wish someone would help me and do it with me!” As I worked my way up the “ranks” in sports, I committed myself to being the varsity player who always made himself available to younger players who wanted to work out with me. Inexperience and naivety go hand in hand. 


The story seemingly repeated itself again and again. I would tell a younger player about my workouts before school, during sports PE, regular football practice, and my extra cardio after practice was over. They would show up for a bit but eventually would trail off and give up. When I would ask them what was going on and when they would return to the grind with me, they would either respond with avoidance or anger. I learned an essential lesson in this season of life: people usually like the idea of something more than they like the work required to attain it in real life. 



I want you to try and imagine a math teacher who taught all of the right things about math, but when students say the wrong answer, they never correct it. Would we consider them a good teacher because they taught the right things but ignored correcting the wrong answers their students gave? No! We would say they are a terrible teacher. There is more to being a good teacher than giving solid lectures on the rules of arithmetic. If they never mark wrong answers as wrong or give out fair grades, they will not have a job for long. 


God is a fair, loving, and righteous Father. He has left us much instruction for our good, but He has also left us much correction and the tools to correct in His Word. When we speak of church discipline, the immediate response is either blind support or an immediate repulsion. People are sinful and thus hate authority of every kind. Our sin is darkness, and it hates the light. Even the most mature Christians must battle their flesh when their sin is exposed and choose to be humble. 


God’s Word is clear:


5 And have you forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons? “My son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor be weary when reproved by him. 6 For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives.” 7 It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline? 8 If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. 9 Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us, and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? 10 For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness. 11 For the moment, all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. 


Hebrews 12:5–11


If we do not accept discipline or, worse, are not disciplined, we have much to fear. God has said He disciplines those He loves, and it is for our good! So, how does that translate to the church? God has prescribed the exact steps for us. 


15 “If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. 16 But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. 17 If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.

Matthew 18:15–17


First, when we see a brother/sister in Christ sinning, we are responsible for bringing that sin to them. If they repent, the process is done! Remember, the goal of church discipline is restoration and reconciliation. If they refuse to repent, we give time for prayer and patience and then bring a few others to address the sinning brother/sister. If they still do not repent, we bring it to church leadership and eventually to the entire church. This should not be a rushed process (unless the sin is public, deliberate, and unrepentant) and should be done in humility and with great patience. 


Now, most people hear and agree with the basics of this: being held accountable for living our Christian lives, and there are consequences for refusing to admit, confess, and repent of sin. However, experience proves otherwise. Most people hate being held accountable. They do not wish to grow and end up being all talk with no walk. It is true of most people, honestly. We church discipline in principle but not in practice. What are we to do?


We must begin in the home. Your marriage should be the number one place where church discipline is exercised. No one sees your sin more than your spouse. Having the humility to accept correction from your spouse and loving them enough to bring correction to them when you see sin is a perfect first step. From there, it should grow outward to include children, extended family and friends, and all of those within your Christian community. The most loving thing anyone can ever do for you is to correct or even rebuke you and save you from continuing down the path of death and destruction in your sin. 


5 Better is open rebuke than hidden love. 6 Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy. 

Proverbs 27:5–6


May God bless your week as you seek His kingdom first! 


Grace and Peace,

Pastor Dan 


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Colossians 1:28

"Him we proclaim, warning everyone and teaching everyone with all wisdom, that we may present everyone mature in Christ."

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